big sis and little brother

In an effort to get S to see J as a playmate and not as the crawling creature that grabs her food, I've been putting J in her crib when they wake up in the morning. I then run away, hide and then run back in yelling, "I'm gonna getchoo!!!" They laugh and laugh and laugh. Today, I heard them laughing together as I was making the my bed in the other room. I peeked in and watched them jabber and laugh at each other. 

So so glad that S has her Pato.

read to me, baby

Bookworm. It's a good thing, too. Don't know if her Dada could survive the heartbreak if she didn't absolutely love books.

the healing powers of a chocolate chip cookie

This picture has nothing to do with this post. It's just too cute.

The idea of taking both my babies to a restaurant always makes me a bit nervous. The idea of taking them to a sit down restaurant alone is not even an idea I ever dare to entertain. But today, I must have woken up feeling extra courageous because I made the spur of the moment decision to take my two out to lunch. Just me and my babies. 

Now, I know this is nothing medal-worthy, and that millions of women do this daily. But let me tell ya... when you have one under two, and one under one...things are tricky. I would think it's like juggling. Normally, you have one ball, then another smaller ball, and who knows, maybe a third and a fourth ball if you're lucky. Sometimes I feel like I'm juggling a ball and a banana. And this is coming from someone who never ever got the hang of juggling in gym class. (Whyyyyy did we juggle in gym??)

So, off to lunch we went. I had J in the stroller and S was very excited to help me push him through the parking lot. I ordered our meals, we sat at our table, and guess what? We rocked it! After ordering our meals I had the chance to order it to go. But no! I would not take my meal to go! I came here and we were going to eat lunch at a table!

Okay...so yeah, we got a ton of the usual looks of people doing the math in their heads trying to figure out how far apart they are. Yeah, S still doesn't like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. (Why am I still trying to make that happen?) Yeah, she really just wanted to pick out and eat every single piece of edamame in my salad and eat it. Yeah, little J got startled when someone nearby dropped a fork. And yeah, I came nowhere near close to finishing my food. Despite all those things, I consider today a huge success.

At one point, I was feeding J in the stroller with one hand and trying to get S to eat her sandwich with my other hand. At that very moment, I had the thought, "You can do hard things." 

Do you ever feel like life is trying to teach you a lesson, and that the same one is hammered into you time and time and time again? At this stage of my life, this is the lesson that I am constantly learning. 

Quite often, I find myself giving myself pep talks:

You can do hard things...but you don't need to be perfect.

You can do hard things...but sometimes you need help.

You can do hard things...but it's okay to take it easy.

You can do hard things...and it's enough just to know that.

You can do hard things...and what you're about to do does not even make the top ten list of hard things you'll ever do.

You can do hard things...and this too shall pass.

So, where does the cookie come in? I ordered one because I knew that after I put the kids down for their nap, I would be a bit worn. I knew that I would grab the comfiest blanket in the house, lay on the couch and sigh. 

There's nothing like a good chocolate chip cookie that says, "Good job, mama. You did it."

an after church letter for j

My sleepy little boyfriend after church.

Dear J,

You were ON one today! You are normally a sweet, happy and smiley little boy that gets incredibly excited about everything. You are also so so sensitive. You cry if someone laughs loudly when you don't expect it or if someone moves too quickly towards you. Peek-a-boo can bring you to tears if there is too much peek in your boo!

This morning, you took charming and cute to a ridiculous level. Did I mention that you love to sing? It's true. Whenever you hear people singing, you sing along with them...yes, even at church. C and I are not singers, so I can't claim you got that from us. Unless you count insane car-singing real singing, at which point I take full responsibility. 

Anyway... you sang and sang during the hymns and dripped drool through your cheesy smile on the lady behind us playing with you. You love to smile and people can't help but smile with you. During the last hour of church, you sat and contently played while the lesson was given. All the ladies around me whispered about you, and I wondered if I should just take you out of the room because other than your cuteness, you can be really loud. You chatted away so loudly...it's really cute, but also very distracting. 

I love how contagious your smile is. I love how much happiness you add to our family. I hope that this special thing about you will never go away. 

Thank you for making this world just a bit brighter.

love, mama

**Disclaimer: If you're reading this and thinking this kid is too good to be true and that I'm just going on and on about him, please know that J most definitely has his moments. Liiiike, around 10 or 11 at night. He often wakes up around this time MAD! Eyes and fists clenched, screaming and wiggling till someone PLEASE gets his mama for "the goods." He also goes from happy to grumpy in about .0032 seconds whenever he gets tired. And he poops. A lot! 

"You eat too much chocolate."

I know. I KNOW. I know what you're thinking. My jaw just about hit the floor as my mom and I drove home from dinner.

Me: Whatttttttt??? (Who is this lady in my mom's body that is saying crazy things?)
Mom: I've noticed you eat a lot of chocolate. You eat it every day!
Me: (I remain silent because I have yet to see what the problem is. She then proceeded to accuse me of eating all the Swiss chocolate that they received as a gift. Fortunately, I got my Dad to fess up to the crime and my honor was restored once again.)
Mom: Ever since you got here I've been eating chocolate every day! I need to stop. I'm not breastfeeding like you!

This interaction made me think a bit.

Doesn't everyone ask their mom to please keep a steady stream of Haggen Dazs stocked in (both) freezers at all times when visiting?

Daily eating schedule: Breakfast, lunch, lunch dessert, dinner, dinner dessert. That's pretty typical. Am I right or am I right?

C will stand as my witness. I cannot remember the last day I went without dessert. I just can't remember. And frankly, I don't want to remember. I think it was before J was born.

I don't think I want to know a life where dessert is not an integral part of it.

lately

Sure are missing our main man around here. 

This girl just loves being outdoors. Her cheeks turn deliciously pink and her hair becomes a hot sweaty mess.

My little musicians. J wants to do everything big sister is doing.// Nordstrom's Anniversary pre-sale! My first in three years (thank you, baby bump!) This sweater is the softest cloudy like sweater that I'll probably wear 2,361 times this fall. Is it fall yet?

morning chuckles

Today I woke up feeling incredibly lucky. Normally, C and I are woken up by S and J chatting in their cribs. They're pretty nice at letting us be a bit lazy in the morning. After they've been chatting to themselves for a bit, we go in and get them from their rooms. This morning, I woke up before either of the babies. I think it's because C is gone. I never seem to sleep quite right when he's away. I was able to lay in bed for a little while before I heard J chatting away in his room. (Did I mention it was after 9:00 AM???) I love this time of day. It is always the same in the morning, and almost always like this after his naps as well.

I quietly go in (J startles very easily), turn off his sound machine, and gently say, "Good morning, Pato!" He is always sitting up when I get there, and he looks up, grins the biggest grin ever. He then flaps his arms up and down wildly and makes you feel like you are the best person in the world, bar none. I can't imagine another person on the face of this earth that could wake up every morning as happy as that. It's almost always the same drill after his naps. I always have to check on him after the 2-hour mark on his naps, otherwise he will just sit in his crib quietly until I get him. One time, I waited too long to get him, and he just went right back down to sleep. Oh, how I love this boy so so so much. 
After getting him from his crib in the morning, I take him back to the bed and nurse him. I always have to be sure to be extra quiet and not look at him as he nurses or else he will start chuckling. Yes, I would say he is more of a chuckler than a giggler. One little look will set him off laughing. And the stinky thing is that he just stares at me as he eats as if to say, "Look at me, Mama! Let's play!"
I'll say it a million times...this boy is my crazy-haired dreamboat.

Overnight, he has decided to become a teeth grinder. Give me goosebumps every time. Sigh.